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(Ed. note: Dave has gone on vacation and will be back November 24th)
Perhaps the most intensely debated issue in football over the past decade is whether Tom Brady or Peyton Manning is the NFL's premiere quarterback. On Sunday night, the two QB's may meet for the last time in the 00's. It could be the last chance for either of them to prove why they should be considered the top quarterback of their era. There have been thousands upon thousands of words written on the subject. Brady supporters point to his three Super Bowl titles. Manning fans reply with Peyton's overall superior statistics. Tom's backers counter that when Brady had the receivers, he broke all of Manning's records. Peyton's camp retorts that when Manning had a supporting cast on par with Brady's he took the Colts to the Super Bowl. It's a debate that may seemingly never end...
Until now! It's pretty clear that when you compare the successing of Manning and Brady, you're left with a near tie. However, what few people consider are the duo's flaws. I mean, if you go 18-0 and then lose the Super Bowl, that's gotta detract a bit from your legacy. Likewise, if you set the NFL record for touchdown passes in a season, only to watch your team get bounced out of the playoffs by only putting up three points, that's also pretty bad. Today, two of Indy and New England's biggest fans will attempt to put the Brady/Manning debate to rest once and for all. 18to88.com will be posting an article highlighting Tom Brady's flaws. FoxboroBlog.com will be countering with Peyton Manning's biggest downfall. When it's all said and done, Dave of MoneylineLoser.com will get his long-time friend Peter King to judge each each quarterback point by point and finally declare once and for all who the QB of the Decade truly is!
Before you read Peter King's verdict, be sure to head on over to 18to88.com to read their rant against Tom Brady.
Peter King's Analysis:
1. Most annoying in-game habit
The Falcons lead the league in anonymity, Matt Schaub leads the league in normalcy, Adrian Peterson leads the league in firm handshaking, Tony Romo leads the league in smiling and Peyton Manning definitely leads the league in arm flapping. That said, Manning just might be a little too intense out there. Loosen up a little Peyton. Follow Brett Favre's example and JUST HAVE FUN OUT THERE. Pretend to be a little kid in the yard and just throw crippling interceptions all game long.
Lamest QB: Manning
2. Worst press conference moment
You can't be surprised by Brady's confidence here. He knew that his coach had numerous illegal tapings of the New York Giants and the game was supposed to be a cake walk for them. A reader e-mailed shortly thereafter to ask me who I thought was going to win the Super Bowl and I said....I said...I said......nothing. I couldn't spoil the surprise then now could I???
Lamest QB: Manning
3. Lamest Advertisement
One thing that you may not know about Peyton Manning is that he is extremely funny. One of my favorite Manning moments happened when he was filming a commercial and it's a story which you can read in my upcoming book (Did you know I had a book coming out????). Manning was filming this commercial for Lipton Iced Tea and the skit was that he was playing flag football with a bunch of 11-year olds. Manning was supposed to throw the kid a ball, but the kid had to drop the pass and Manning would proceed to yell at him for dropping an easy pass. Without missing a beat, Manning goes off-script and stabs the kid in the spleen with a trident. Everyone on the set just burst out into hysterical laughter. Everything was just so spontaneous and random. It was great, almost as if he channeled his inner Jeter.
Lamest QB: Brady.
P.S. This Manning story can be found on page 87 in my book, right after the chapter where I explain why David Terrell was the best pick of the 2001 draft.
4. Worst Player Backed Up in College
I'm sitting behind my Macbook Air, wondering where the next closest Starbucks is and I decide to give Manning's former back-up,Todd Helton, a call. I ask Helton who his favorite player is in Major League Baseball and he says, "Peter, I've got to with Derek Jeter". It's easy to see why Helton would say that because Jeter is by far the best player I've ever seen in my lifetime. You can argue that Albert Pujols is better at 1. hitting, b. fielding, III. everything else, but Jeter just possesses this intangible that I can't quite put my finger on. He is quasy Welker-ian when he takes the field. I then hung up the phone and masturbated violently.
Lamest QB: Brady.
5. Lamest Photo
I just love that picture of Brady with the goat. It reminds me of the time I spent with Brett Favre on his Mississippi farm. You won't believe the amazing things I got to see Brett do during those days. He played with his dog, he watched tv, he helped his kids with homework and he helped his wife with the groceries. Just an amazing man all around.
Lamest QB: Manning
6. Worst facial feature
Tom's chin reminds me so much of Brett Favre's groin. Sometimes I like to pretend that it's Brett's groin and then I massage it with hot oils and tickle it with feathers. Brady definitely leads the league in having the best chin.
Lamest QB: Manning
7. Wussiest Rule Change
Brady made sure that quarterbacks are protected by the refs and Manning made sure that no defensive back can get within 10 yards of his receivers or else they'll get flagged. I love both rule changes, as long as their applied to Brett Favre as well.
Speaking of great quarterbacks, if you send me $1,000, you can have lunch with me and my friend Donnie "Brasco" Banks and I'll tell you where Aaron Brooks and Patrick Ramsey rank among the great quarterbacks on this decade. Brasco will let you in on some athlete secrets while I'll be there for the comic relief!
Lamest QB: Tie
8. Biggest scandal
I like how Brady handled that goon that wanted to take a picture of him at his own wedding. It reminds me of the time that an innocent, 8-year old kid tried to get a foul ball at a spring training baseball game. The kid trespassed to an area where he wasn't allowed to be and I made sure that he did not get that ball. I lied to the kid, made sure that security escorted him away and then I cleverly used my press credentials to get to the ball. That will teach that brat to try and get a baseball at a meaningless spring training game. Kids like that grow up to be those annoying people that chew gum on trains!
I mean, what's next, tourists taking pictures in New York??
Lamest QB: Manning
9. Lamest Celebrity fan
Yesterday I came across this little band called Metallica and I tell you what, they have some great songs! I'll be putting these on my iPod touch for those long hours on the train. They may be loud but it beats listening to those filthy gum chewers! That's almost quasy Aqib Talib-ish.
Lamest QB: Brady
And the Quarterback of the Decade is...
This may come as a surprise but the quarterback of the decade is Brett Favre. He hasn't won a ring this decade and he only keeps adding to his interception totals, but THE MAN JUST HAS FUN OUT THERE. The Vikings made a great decision to bring Favre on the team and he is the single reason why they are one of the favorites in the NFC right now. I was saying all along that the Vikings should hand their team over to Favre and now that he is singe handedly leading them to victory, it just further cements his amazing legacy as the greatest quarterback of the decade and the greatest player of the decade and maybe even of all-time. He's quasy Jeter-ish when it comes to the quarterback position.
And not only is he a great player, he's just a great person in general. I was watching the Vikings-Packers game with my buddies Barry, Jerry, Larry and Larry Derryberry and suddenly a player on the Packers went down. Brett immediately sprinted over to see if the player in question was ok. Never have I seen any player do something like that and that's why I was so furious when FOX switched over to the Carolina-Arizona game instead of showing me how Brett was savoring his victory over those evil, evil Packers.
If Brett Favre does not lead the Vikings to a Super Bowl this year, I won't mention Starbucks in any of my columns for one whole year. Promise.
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